"But why, Mom?"
I'm not sure where we get these ideas that discipline does not matter. As I walk to class each day, I am faced with the question, "How do I discipine?" Part of me wants the kids to really accept who I am; to be the "fun" teacher. The other part of me wants to toss some of my students out the window due to lack of respect. Am I here to be their friend, or to TEACH? Ah, yes, Teach!
Yesterday I walked by a very intelligent student of mine who was cheating off of another student. I was so disappointed in him because he is one of my top students who is a hard worker. I was forced to answer that question again... "How do I discipline?" Well, unfortanately, it needed an imediate answer. I took the homework, ripped it up, and threw it in the trash- this meant no credit. I could see the mortification all over his face. It gripped my heart as I saw this smart young man feel the consequence. He said, "Teacher, there were only two questions!" He was angry. As time passed and class moved on, he began participating again.
After class, I asked him. "Do you understand why?" He said, "Yes, I cheated! I copied two answers... I cheated... I understand."
I was so proud of him... not for cheating, but for fessing up to it!
I know I am not a mother- and won't be for a long while, but I am beginning to appreciate all of those "time-outs," spankings, and just plain "No's." They actually did teach me something! Thanks, Ma!
5 comments:
And in the end he will repesct you incredibly for it. "Love" doesn't always mean be nice and happy with people all the time. When you show this kind of "tough love" to someone they learn from it, grow from it, and it ultimately sharpens them. Hopefully into a tool that God can use for further sharpening of the people in His kingdom.
You are good and I'm proud of ya.
Spankings, when you explain to the child why you are doing it, and done in a way that is discipline but not abuse, can be effective. Are spankings allowed to be given in your school? Have you ever spanked someone, and did you find it worked, or did it not help?
NO, we do not touch the kids! I have heard in other schools that this is still allowed, but not here.
I have never spanked anyone myself because I do not have children. However, speaking from the other side of it as someone who did receive them; I know they worked. As you said before, if it is done in love, it can be effective. Of course all children are different. Some other modes of discipline may be more effective for different children. Thanks for your comment. You can rest easy... my fiercest form of punishment at the moment is the "teacher Look"... we all have seen the "teacher look" at least once or twice!
Shantra
so true, so true... the majority of the time, i want to toss my middle schoolers off the balcony of my 3rd floor classroom, but then they'd probably be dead or severely injured. and no one wants that, at least not until they've received eternal life. :) anyway, i can definitely relate, and i think you are doing an incredible job modeling the justice of our Maker. it's not always about us "liking" Him, but rather about our holiness and sometimes painful journey into His likeness. you are headed there. so very encouraging you are in your walk, Shan. roll with it!!
peace, adam
Hi Shantra, first of all, I'm a friend of Matt and Diane's and I linked over to your blog from Matt's. I really appreciate your blog on discipline. Ahh, yes, discipline. Good job on your consequence with your student! He'll respect your authority in the future a lot more. I work in a large library and you'd be appalled to see what misbehaviors parents allow to go uncorrected. They are spoiled. There are lots of ways to discipline; every child is different and requires a different tacitic. I'm no expert and even though I feel I've failed my children many times, it's very gratifying for my 20 year old son, after many years of discipline, to say, "You and Dad did a great job with us kids". Take heart and be consistant; you are planting a seed. Sometimes the results don't show up for a long, long time.
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